Eu tenho um amigo chamado John, ele

Eu tenho um amigo chamado John, ele resolveu ser surfista para impressionar a mulherada. Na primeira caída no mar a praia estava lotada, muitas gatas na areia. Logo, quando ele estava entrando no mar, uma onda pegou ele e a onda foi arrastando o peito na areia grossa, ele se ralou todo. O pior é que as pernas dele enrolaram na cordinha (leash) e não conseguiu ficar em pé e ficou se afogando bem no rasinho onde nem um bebê se afogaria. Um cara foi lá, puxou meu amigo pelos braços e como a bermuda dele era de um tecido muito grosso o peso da água fez com que ela descesse até os joelhos e ele estava sem cueca, ficou totalmente nu, todo mundo ria dele, tinha até gente tirando foto. Foi ridículo. Ele voltou para casa derrotado e humilhado pelo mar. Acho que não conseguiu impressionar nenhuma garota, pelo menos não do modo que eu esperava...mas continuou surfando.

Results (English) 1:

I have a friend named John, he decided to be a surfer to impress the chicks. On first down at sea the beach was crowded, many cats in the sand. Later, when he was entering the sea, a wave caught him and the wave was dragging the chest in coarse sand, he cared. What's worse is that his legs wrapped in cord (leash) and was unable to stand and was drowning in the shallow, you can where or a baby'd drown. A man was there, my friend pulled his arms and as his shorts was a very thick tissue water weight caused her to come down to his knees and he was not wearing any underwear, was totally naked, everyone laugh at him, even had people taking pictures. It was ridiculous. He returned home defeated and humiliated by the sea. I think failed to impress no girl, at least not the way I expected ... but continued riding.

Results (English) 3:

I have a friend named John, he decided to be a surfer to impress the girls. In the first fallen on the sea beach was crowded, many cats in the sand. Therefore, when he was walking in the sea, wave and the wave took he was dragging the chest in the coarse sand, he cared.The worst part is that his legs wrapped in string (leash) and was unable to stand and was drowning in the rasinho where not a baby drowned. A man was there, pulled my friend by the arms and as the Bermuda was a very thick fabric, the weight of the water made her fall to my knees and he was without underwear, was totally naked, everyone was laughing at him, he had to people taking photo.It was ridiculous. He returned to the house defeated and humiliated by the sea. I don 't think managed to impress a girl, at least not the way I expected... But continued surfing.